


A Night For Truths

by ellebeedarling



Category: Raven Cycle - Maggie Stiefvater
Genre: Coming Out, Familial Relationships, M/M, a bit of angst, a bit of fun
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-10-14
Updated: 2018-10-14
Packaged: 2019-08-02 02:46:39
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 3,052
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/16296803
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/ellebeedarling/pseuds/ellebeedarling
Summary: Ronan and Adam decide it's time to tell Declan and Matthew about their relationship. The night doesn't go how any of them expect.





	A Night For Truths

“This is a stupid, fucking idea.” 

 

“Well, we could always call it off,” Adam said, head stuck in the refrigerator as he surveyed its barrenness. He should have checked earlier. They were set to eat burgers with Declan and Matthew in less than twenty minutes and there was no ketchup or mayonnaise. 

 

“Don’t be ridiculous. They’re already on their way.” Ronan was stomping around the kitchen, slamming cabinet doors because he could, because this was how he behaved when he was mad and antsy and petulant. 

 

Adam rolled his eyes. “Well, we could forget the idea of telling them about us.” There was mustard. Adam sniffed it. He looked at the expiration date. _ Does mustard go bad? How could Ronan have used an entire bottle of ketchup since his birthday? _ Adam set the lonely mustard bottle on the counter. Ronan produced brand new containers of ketchup and mayonnaise from a cupboard with a superior glance at Adam. Adam rolled his eyes again.

 

“They’re going to find out eventually,” Ronan snapped as soon as he was done showing off. He followed it with another slam of a cabinet door and a torrent of swear words. Adam was always impressed by Ronan’s proficiency at swearing - the savage beauty of it. And it was true. Declan had already started interrogating Ronan about why he was so quick to dart off to Adam’s apartment above St. Agnes church on Sundays after Mass. Ronan always ignored the questions, but he also told Adam about them, which meant he was worried. 

 

Adam wanted to tell him to stop raising such a ruckus, but he didn’t - he wasn’t an idiot. He considered telling him to have a beer and  _ calm the fuck down, _ but he didn’t - Adam hadn’t grown any dumber in the last two seconds. The one thing Declan Lynch hated worse than his brother, Ronan, was his brother, Ronan, after he’d been drinking. 

 

“We could break up. Then they’d never have to know.” This was said with all the detachment Adam possessed - a considerable amount, actually. His grin was purposefully buried under a mask of indifference.

 

Ronan stopped his stomping and slamming and swearing to stare at his boyfriend in shock. Adam laughed. “Asshole,” Ronan hissed and resumed his stomping and slamming and swearing. 

 

Adam intercepted Ronan, long fingers curling around the other boy’s wrists overtop the leather straps he wore to cover the worst of his scars, and pulled him close. “It’ll either be fine or it won’t, but it won’t change us.” 

 

Ronan considered, eyes darting restlessly around the room. On the one hand, Ronan didn’t give a shit what Declan Lynch thought of him. He’d long since lost all respect for his brother. Ronan didn’t understand, and therefore couldn’t condone, the fact that Declan was always lying, always cheating, always scheming. While Ronan was dark and dangerous, he was honest - to a fault. He’d only told one outright lie since Adam had known him, and that was to spare his mother’s feelings in regards to Declan. And while there had been many lies of omission, they too were only in place to protect the things that Ronan loved. 

 

On the other hand, Declan had been attempting, in his very Declan - which was to say,  _ un- _ Ronan - way to mend the rift between them. He still mothered and doddered too much for Ronan’s tastes, but even a blackguard like Ronan was forced to admit that there was something to be said for the trying. 

 

He sighed, billowy and deep, leaning his forehead against Adam’s as if siphoning some hidden strength for himself. Adam let him, holding his wrists and using them to maneuver the other boy closer. “It’s gonna be fine,” Adam repeated, then released his hold on Ronan’s wrists in order to cup his face and draw him closer for a kiss. 

 

It was the sort of kiss that lingered, meant to soothe and console rather than arouse, and Ronan accepted it for what it was, grateful for Adam’s strength and peace when he seemed to possess neither for himself. It often worked like this for the pair of them. When Adam was weak, Ronan was strong, and vice versa. They complimented each other and held each other up when it was required. Both of them appreciated it. Neither of them acknowledged it out loud, but neither was willing to take it for granted. 

 

They heard the hum of voices in the hallway a split-second too late. Matthew hooted - though whether that was to announce their presence, or because he’d seen the boys kissing, was difficult to say. Declan’s words died in his throat as he stopped in the doorway to the nostalgic kitchen. 

Once when the Pig had stranded the team of intrepid adventurers and king seekers on the side of a highway, Gansey had been forced to call Declan to their rescue. Ronan, of course, had hated and protested this idea. His complaints had inevitably fallen on deaf ears, and he’d resigned himself to an imminent engagement with his brother. Ronan had then sprawled across the backseat of the Pig, leg thrown over Adam’s as he’d pretended to sleep. This sort of careless touching had happened quite often before they’d kissed in Ronan’s room, and Adam had only just begun to probe the edges of the reason behind it that day in the Pig. 

 

In retrospect, he easily saw that it was Ronan’s way of being closer to Adam without having to confess. Though the touches had seemed nothing more than convenient and indifferent at the time, in reality, they’d been desperate acts committed by a hungry and touch-starved boy, an innocuous way for Ronan to fit himself into Adam’s life in a new and different manner. 

 

That day, Declan had seen Ronan’s leg over Adam’s for what it was, and he’d found fault in it. Adam remembered clearly the look of disdain Declan had sent his brother’s way, and it was the same look Declan wore at this very minute. 

 

At least they no longer had to worry about how to broach the topic with Declan.

 

Beside him, Ronan bristled, daring Declan to call them out on it, ready to leap across the counter to bash his brother’s nose in once it became apparent that it was required. Declan and Ronan stared at each other. Adam watched them both warily. Matthew said, “I’m starving! Let’s start the grill.” 

 

The elder Lynch brothers blinked, and the moment was broken. Adam produced a box of hamburger patties out of the fridge, which Matthew cheerily took and headed out the back door with. The grill was already going, and Adam knew it would be a mistake to leave the remaining two Lynch brothers alone in the kitchen together. “Let’s have dinner,” he said, drawing a scowl from both Declan and Ronan. Gripping Ronan’s hand in his own, he casually led the boy out the back door, aware that Ronan was still glaring daggers at Declan over his shoulder. 

 

All through their meal, the contempt between Ronan and Declan was palpable enough to stab through with a knife. Adam considered doing so - briefly. Matthew, jovial as always, prodded and cajoled both his brothers and Adam into an impromptu soccer game. All three boys obliged him because Ronan and Declan could never deny their brother anything, and because Adam wanted to contribute to anything that would help broker peace between the brothers. 

 

As the night wound down, Matthew’s curly, golden head began drooping sleepily against the back of the couch. Adam cleaned up the few dishes from dinner. He knew it was a mistake to leave the eldest Lynch brothers alone, but at the same time, they’d invited Declan out here tonight to reveal the truth to him. The truth always came with consequences - some good, some bad - and Adam knew that this would end up another festering wound in the relationship between Declan and Ronan Lynch if they didn’t work this out tonight. So, he’d reluctantly abandoned them in the backyard in order to clean and strained from the sink - nerves awash with electricity - to eavesdrop. He could see them through the tiny kitchen window, standing directly in the square of yellow light. Ronan was as tense as ever, Declan no less so. But they appeared to be talking - not yelling, which surprised Adam. Perhaps the night would end victoriously. 

 

When Declan burst through the backdoor several minutes later, Adam looked down to where his hand was trying to polish a hole through the laminate countertop by the sink. He attempted to appear engrossed in his activity rather than the two brothers. Declan paused to run a frustrated hand through his hair and blow out a stream of curses. The elder Lynch wasn’t nearly as adept as his younger brother. When he realized that Adam was standing there staring - having given up all pretense of cleaning - Declan startled then cursed again. 

 

“Parrish,” he said. “I-”

 

Adam had never witnessed a speechless Declan before. The man always had a sharp comeback or a succinct lie on the tip of his tongue. It was unsettling to see him with neither. “Lynch,” Adam said. 

 

Declan heaved a great sigh, ruffling his hair with his fingers once more. “If you can stand his obstinance, more power to you,” he said at last. “Honestly, I think you deserve someone better.” 

 

“Someone less male or merely less Ronan?” Adam asked, feeling the simmering edges of his anger beginning to boil. It was hard to like Declan, and not just because of Ronan’s feelings on the subject. Declan had accomplished that impressive feat all on his own, simply by virtue of his Declan-ness. Adam wasn’t sure exactly why Declan was against their relationship, but he didn’t mean to let the man leave this property without finding out. 

 

“Please,” Declan scoffed. “I was only trying to offer a bit of friendly advice. Do with it what you will.” He made to leave.

 

“Uh-huh.” Adam’s arms were crossed over his chest, hands hidden away to conceal their trembling. Declan appeared to be genuine, but he wore deception like a second skin. Declan was as proficient at lying as Ronan was at swearing. 

 

At the doorway to the kitchen, Declan stopped and whirled to face Adam again. “He’s my brother, Parrish. Did you think I didn’t know that he’s gay? I honestly don’t give a fuck about that. It’s just that he’s also always been intent on making a spectacle of himself at every turn. Just because things appear settled doesn’t mean that they are. It doesn’t mean that every bad thing that would use Ronan to suit their own purposes has mysteriously vanished. Don’t you think that there are still things lurking in the dark?”

 

A shiver raced up Adam’s spine, but he held it in check. Of course he knew. He also knew that he and Ronan had become somewhat complacent lately. “What does that have to do with our relationship?” 

 

“Just… like I’ve been telling Ronan his whole damned life… try not to draw unnecessary attention to yourselves. That’s all I’m asking.”

 

“Hide it, you mean.” 

 

Declan cursed again. “Clearly you’ve been spending too much time with him. My concern is - has only ever been - for his  _ safety _ . His and Matthew’s. And now yours, I suppose. Things that get mixed up with Ronan tend to come to a bad end, is all I’m saying.” Declan looked forlorn for a brief moment - a moment where Adam felt the stirrings of pity for what it meant to be Declan Lynch - before he swiped it away with the palm of his hand. “I’m not sure what I can say to convince you of my sincerity here.” 

 

“Maybe if you’d ever been sincere before, it would be easier to swallow,” Adam retorted, though he did understand what Declan was trying to say. Things - people,  _ buyers _ \- were still out there, searching for the Greywaren. People who wouldn’t hesitate to kill him or Matthew or Declan if it meant getting to Ronan. Ronan was a weapon - he always had been - and in the wrong hands, that weapon could unmake the world. It broke Adam’s heart a little - thinking of Ronan as a commodity - but the bitterness of the thought didn’t make it any less true in the eyes of some. A protective instinct Adam hadn’t known he possessed surged through him - bloodthirsty, unchecked. 

 

“Now you see,” Declan said, recognizing the new light in Adam’s eyes. “If you  _ love _ him-”

 

“No,” Adam said sternly. “You don’t get to throw that up and use it as a weapon or a tool to get what you want.” 

 

“What exactly is it you think I want? I want us all - me, Matthew, you and Ronan - to live normal happy lives. Do you think I want him to have to hide who he is -  _ any  _ part of who he is - from the world? I’m not saying these things because I’m homophobic, for Christ’s sake! What Ronan does in his private life, who Ronan loves - that’s none of my business. But, you’re not naive enough to think that love is  _ enough _ . Don’t you see? Once it’s known that  _ you _ are his weakness, they’ll use you to get to  _ him _ .” He flung his arm in the direction of the backdoor to emphasize the  _ him  _ in question. 

 

To hear that he was Ronan’s weakness came as no great shock; the reverse was equally true. To think that either of them couldn’t live without the other was as ludicrous as it was wrong. Survival would be unpleasant, life-altering maybe, but not impossible. Ronan had proven time and again that he was strong enough to go on living after being robbed of the things he loved. Adam also knew his own capacity for enduring. But Adam had realized months ago that their connection to each other could be used against them as a weapon or a bargaining chip. And the fact of the matter remained that he didn’t  _ want  _ to attempt a life without Ronan. He supposed the reverse was equally true in this case as well. 

 

Ronan had still not made an appearance in the kitchen, and Adam didn’t know if he was listening from the porch or skulking and brooding in the backyard. He began to wonder why he’d ever thought this dinner was a good idea at all. Declan was right though, and Adam hated that admission at least as much as the message that Declan was delivering. He thought for a few moments before allowing himself to reply. “I understand what you’re trying to say, and I can easily imagine Ronan’s response to it.” 

 

Declan spat an ugly curse.

 

Adam continued as if he hadn’t. “But I, for one, am not willing to let fear dictate how I live my life.”  _ Not anymore, _ he thought. “I don’t think Ronan is either.” 

 

When Declan conceded failure, Adam saw it. Surprisingly, he didn’t lash out. Instead, the defeat slumped Declan’s shoulders, his head drooped. He braced himself with hands on either side of the doorway, as though he’d collapse without the solidity of the old house to hold him upright. The dispiriting light from the hallway hid his face, but Adam could see the torment the man was in from the line of his body, the set of his jaw. Declan didn’t like to lose. “Will you do me a favor then, Parrish?” he asked, quiet and raw, an altogether un-Declan-like sound. “Try to make him happy again?” 

 

Adam’s heart broke a little more. He began to think he’d misjudged Declan all along. And while some part of him longed for the power to make Ronan Lynch happy, he knew: “Ronan’s his own man, Declan. You know that better than I do.” Nothing and no one could make Ronan happy if he didn’t wish to be so, but if Ronan was bound to find some happiness in the life that he’d made for himself, then Adam wanted to be a part of it. This was the only promise he could make to Declan. 

 

Declan rapped his knuckles against the doorframe once, then nodded and went to collect Matthew. Ronan was waiting on the front porch for them all. He said a gruff goodbye to Declan, accompanied by a reluctant handshake. This seemed to take all three Lynch brothers by surprise. Ronan covered it with a malevolent glare, then he hugged Matthew and kissed his golden curls. Adam sat on the top step of the porch watching the receding taillights of Declan’s Volvo and the flickering of Ronan’s fireflies illuminate the yard. Ronan joined him, linking their fingers. 

 

“That could’ve gone worse,” Adam mused. 

 

“Could’ve gone better,” Ronan pointed out. 

 

Adam nodded in concession. Declan had unpacked a suitcase full of uncomfortable truths, but for once, Adam was willing to let them wait. He simply did not want to expend the energy to sort out these problems tonight. Instead of focusing on what could go wrong, he considered what had gone right. Declan was accepting - if reluctantly - of his and Ronan’s relationship. Adam had never imagined Matthew having a problem with it, so that was not a concern. Ronan and Declan had enjoyed an entire evening together without coming to blows - and honestly, even Adam, non-believer that he was, had to admit what a miracle that had been. Despite the fact that he’d had to spend an entire evening with Declan Lynch, Ronan was in a fine mood. Wonders never ceased, it seemed.

 

“Wanna go skinny dipping?” he asked, standing and reaching for Ronan’s hand.

 

Ronan allowed himself to be pulled up as well. “Parrish, you horny bastard.” 

Adam didn’t wear denial well, so he merely shrugged. Returning Ronan’s lazy grin, he tugged his shirt over his head and toed off his sneakers, then reached for his belt buckle. Ronan’s eyes were drawn to his hands - as they often were - and Adam’s smile turned devious as he yanked his jeans down, kicking them away, and took off at a brisk pace. The boys raced through the fields of impossible flowers and improbable creatures, chased by their own laughter and Chainsaw’s excited calls. Ronan shucked out of his clothes as they ran through the too-warm night, and when they neared the water’s edge, they clasped hands and leapt. 

**Author's Note:**

> Thanks for reading!
> 
> Find me on Tumblr: [ellebeedarling](http://ellebeedarling.tumblr.com)
> 
> Much love,  
> Elle


End file.
